Before we dive into this month’s juicy one, here’s the short and sweet on May’s cliffhanger: HONOURING BUSINESS. We proposed that ‘Business’ doesn’t actually exist … it is merely a word for you and me and others who like getting together and trading our stuff or skills. Similarly, the tag ‘NHL’ is us – you and me and others who rally and support, and play a fast hard game.
Not realizing this, our protagonists went through their nightly rounds of lying to themselves. The hockey player, because he played for the NHL, justified his desire to “take that guy’s head off”. And as it was ‘just business’, the financial advisor decided it was permissible to ‘ponzi’ his brother. The two readied their plans, punched their pillows, and confidently waited for a good night’s sleep. But as a good Knight’s sleep is based on Honour, not pillows and dirty deeds, these two faced the challenges of a really bad (K)night.
They spent hours fighting—hiding from their past deeds of Dishonour; hiding themselves from themselves; until exhausted, they lay quietly and realized the following: They, as well as you and I, and almost everyone else had fooled themselves into thinking there’s an Honour Code for business, another one for family, another for this situation, or when in the company of that person. We thought we could divide Honour. Uh uh. It’s one Code of Honour or no Code of Honour.
So, what of HONOURING OURSELVES? Honour speaks the Truth about me … to me, and the Truth about you … to you. Dishonour is pretending Truth about ourselves in order to benefit ourselves. And it’s living one truth with those people, and another or opposite one with these people. Thinking we can divide Honour into convenient boxes is a swindle; a trick perpetuated by those of us who are out for our own gain (often needlessly at the expense of others). And those of us who are, somehow, making it seem as if all of us are filled with Dishonour. Which is untrue?
You and I are Honourable. Human beings are Honourable. Forget what the media tells you to believe … set those opinions aside and instead, make the determination for yourself. Look at all the people around you: their kindness, honesty, and ethics. Go through all the ways those people Honour you. E.g., listening, seeking your expertise or your presence, mentoring, giving care or affection. Then look at how you Honour others … many others. Because you surely do. True, we do bad things on purpose sometimes, and we talk ourselves into things we shouldn’t, so it’s worth holding yourself to a high standard. But more often than not, you’re probably honourable – and when you’re not, you probably feel bad about it (until and unless you find a way to justify it).
If you are not sure what constitutes your own Code of Honour, consider asking the simple questions our two ‘in-the-making’ heroes used. 1) Did I … do I intend to cause harm? 2) Did or do I intend to take too much gain or violate the trust of others? 3) How did and do I justify myself?
And just like our heroes, take that knowledge and wisdom, everywhere and into everything you do.
Code of Honour